Beware of Dressing in the Dark

About once each week I commute to Atlanta from Utah to go to work. The night before I pack and set out my uniform for the next morning. Since I usually get up at 3:30 to catch the 6:00 flight, I like to be as efficient as possible in the morning.

This past week, as usual, I reached into my closet to grab my pants. Since I have several pairs of black pants I felt for the right pair by the material. Finding the pair I wanted, I then hung them in the bathroom.

The next morning--if 3:30 can really be called morning--I got up and groggily dressed. Truth be told, the light was on, but I wasn't thinking especially clearly. I do remember noticing that the right rear pocket was buttoned closed, which I hadn't remembered doing. That was a warning sign but I didn't take heed.

After dressing I loaded my suitcase in the car and drove to the airport where I caught my flight to Atlanta. I still hadn't noticed anything. Once in Atlanta I found that I had nothing scheduled for that day so I proceeded on to my "crash pad" apartment, where I ate and then took a nap. Before lying down I undressed, still not noticing anything amiss. Can you say "fatigued?"

It wasn't until the next morning when I was about to leave to catch the bus back to the airport that I realized that not only were the pants I was wearing not my uniform pants, they were not even black. The were navy blue. And pleated. Both no-nos.

I hadn't packed a second pair of pants, so I scrambled about looking for options. At this point I saw that my roommate (who was still in Utah) had a pair of uniform pants hanging up. I reasoned that they would probably fit, although he is shorter and a little stouter than I am. This was an emergency, after all. They did fit, Not particularly well, but well enough.

Riding to the airport I hoped he would be understanding. As it was about 6:30 in the morning in Utah, I elected not to call him to ask for permission. But the more I thought about it the more concerned I was. What if he got to the crash pad expecting to use those pants and found them gone?

Fortunately Crew Outfitters, one of the uniform stores, has a branch location right in the ASA operations center at the airport. I happily arrived at the airport with a half hour to spare and marched right in, finding pants in just the right size. The only downside? Then were not hemmed. It didn't matter. I bought them and then tried doing a quick hem job myself. The results were worse than bad. I then tried safety pins with greater success. I then placed my roommates pants in his mailbox (and later called him to explain why his pants were there).

So for three days I wore unhemmed pants. But they were black. And not pleated.

When I return to Atlanta in a couple of days I will bring a backup pair of pants and a uniform shirt as well. You just never know when you may need it. Or why.

And You Thought You Had a Long Commute?

As an airline pilot with Atlantic Southeast Airlines (ASA) I am based in Atlanta, Georgia. Like many pilots, however, I do not live in Georgia. In my case I commute from Utah. Often it’s not a bad commute, as commutes go. Once a week I fly four hours to Atlanta on one of Delta’s nonstop flights and once a week I fly back. In fact, I chose ASA in part because there are eight nonstop flights between Salt Lake City and Atlanta every day. That shouldn’t be so bad, right?

Generally it’s not. But sometimes the flights are full and then I have to get creative. Being a pilot I have “jumpseat” privileges, which means that I can fly in the extra seat in the cockpit with virtually any airline, so I have plenty of options, as long as the seat isn’t already taken. Usually I go through Denver on Frontier, and I have also gone through Chicago.

Once in a while things get tricky. This past week American Airlines grounded a third of their fleet. Big deal. But in order to minimize their passengers inconvenience, American sent them on other airlines. The net result was everyone was full, including the jumpseats. Delta, Frontier, United, etc. Apparently I’m not the only crazy commuter.

I had to be in Atlanta by 3:00PM Saturday. By the time I realized the depth of my predicament it was 11:30AM on Friday. I put everything down and packed, hoping to get lucky by starting earlier. I knew I wouldn’t make it in time for the 1:30PM Delta nonstop, so I my next bet was the 5:10PM nonstop.

I arrived at the gate only to find my worst fear realized: the plane was oversold with multiple standbys and three other pilots already in line for the single jumpseat. There was no way I was going to make this flight, and whoever didn’t get on would wait for the next one at 12:50AM, and then the 6:00AM, etc.

I hustled over to Concourse A to see if I could get to Denver. Frontier was departing at 4:50. It was full, but the jumpseat was open. In fact on the Airbus 319, there are two, and there were two of us, but the captain convinced the other jumpseater to sit in the cabin on the flight attendant jumpseat by telling him that one of the flight attendants was a cute blonde.

OK, so far, so good. My plan was to make Frontier’s 6:55PM connection from Denver to Atlanta. With two jumpseats instead of one I should still get there that same night. But no dice. Once in Denver I went immediately to the gate to find both jumpseats already spoken for. Frontier’s next flight was at 12:25AM, with no guarantee that I would be able to get it.

I rushed from Concourse A to Concourse C to see what else was available. One of the maddening things about the Denver airport is each concourse’s departure and arrival screens are only for that concourse. If you want to know about other flights at the airport you have to physically go to the applicable concourse. There I found that Delta had a flight at 12:50AM. Then to Concourse B, where I found a United flight that was departing in just 15 minutes. I hurried, only to find—yes, you guessed it—the airplane full and the jumpseat taken.

It was time to get creative. I called my Mom and had her log into Delta’s employee website and together we looked at several possibilities. The Delta flight was oversold just like the flights in Salt Lake City, so not a good option. There were more flights the next morning but equally as bad. AirTran left the next morning at 8:00AM, so that was a possibility, but nothing looked like a sure thing, and I needed a sure thing.

What about other cities? I looked at the departures and saw that Southwest was going to Kansas City at 9:10PM. Mom checked on Delta flights from Kansas City to Atlanta and found that the 6:00AM flight to Atlanta had 36 empty seats on it, and the 7:10AM flight also had empty seats and was operated by ASA, which meant I would have priority. I just might make it!

I boarded the Southwest flight and did my best to sleep en route. Arriving shortly before midnight, Central Time, I searched for a place I could snooze. I found a chair that would work, called home and updated my wife, and then tried my best to sleep. It could have been worse, but it was not quality sleep.

Then at 5:00AM I dragged myself to the gate. Empty seats were plentiful, and I even scored a first class spot! As soon as the plane was airborne I put the seat back and closed my eyes. We were delayed somewhat en route, but finally touched down at 9:30AM Eastern Time. I had made it!

All in all my commute this weekend totaled three flights and about seventeen hours. In the six months I have worked for ASA this has been the hardest one. Thank goodness this is not normal. I hope.